I’m two weeks into my new job, and I’m feeling all kinds of ways about it. I mean, pretty much all the positive ways, but also – many of the insecure anxiety ways too.
I have absolutely Slacked my onboarding buddy with a panicked, “OMG they’re totally going to fire me for this!” message. Everything that’s not 100% feels like a total fail. I feel like I’m not keeping up or getting it fast enough. And little woopsies feel like glaring, terrible errors.
But here’s the thing – none of that is actually true in reality. I’m making about a mistake (or two) a day, and nothing that can’t be answered or fixed or learned from for the next time. In fact, it’s all quite the lesson and a powerful process for me.
Making a mistake a day forces me to deal with it.
Honestly, that might be the most uncomfortable part. What do I do and say right now? What do I learn? What happens next? Where do I put my overwhelming emotions, and how do I cope with them as quickly as possible without not acknowledging them at all?
That last part is really the kicker. I’ve been accountable to only myself for a long time, so being part of a team where folks are giving me regular feedback – which, sometimes, is constructive – is a thing I have to remember how to navigate. Work is emotional for sure, and anybody who says it isn’t or shouldn’t be is a liar, but I do think there’s a balance in effectively learning to manage my emotions.
Every single time I get a piece of feedback, I don’t need to collapse. Every time I go to my manager when I could’ve gone to someone else and not bothered her isn’t a reason to freak out and feel stupid and apologize over and over. Every time I feel overwhelmed, I don’t need to assume the worst.
Instead, a check-in is all that’s required.
How am I feeling? What has me feeling this way? What’s really going on there? What else and what’s next?
Walking myself through that quick series of questions more easily helps me to see where I’m at in space, why it’s perfectly OK, and how to move on.
There are a lot of platitudes out there about making mistakes. Most of them are probably true. Some of them are probably a little meh. Because I don’t think it’s just about learning from your mistakes, as in, I’ll never do that again!
I think, when we tune into the mistakes we make each day, it provides yet another opportunity for self-discovery.
If we pause for a minute, or reflect on it later, checking in with ourselves about our reactions, responses, and related emotions, we can learn far more than just the practical knowledge. Sure, I want to learn where to find that information and how to respond to that customer. But it’s equally as valuable to learn exactly where to find myself when in uncomfortable situations and to know how to respond to uncomfortable feelings.
Is there something here about making mistakes great again? 😉
Here’s to dealing with our mistakes.
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